Growing Up Between Children's Homes and Hackney Streets

Yeah, welcome Legions Word. Yeah, as I was saying, to people that might not have been listening, I'm just going to follow on from last week while I was in the school children's home. Yeah, so I was in St. Patrick's and I don't know if you was listening. I used to go back and forth to the children's home from school and I wasn't too sure how I was getting there. But basically we used to get in a cab. So I think it's 1988, 89. I think I left later and me and my brother Richard, we moved over to Stoke Newton. We ended up spending about two, three years in Hackney. So from Hackney, we used to go back to school, St. Patrick's in a cab. But my brother was older, so I think he eventually went on to Holy Family. And a lot of the time I'm saying these conversations relating to my stories to try and reach the next generation and people in care system and in good homes and normal homes. And during my stories, well, I put people's initials in there. They're like kids I related to in school. But also remember, there's an after school and a lot of kids for me, they used to go school and then they go home after school. So a lot of the kids I'm trying to see the kids that never went straight home and went home and then played at after school and then met some outside influences anyway. But back to my little experiences in children's home. Back to my experiences in children's home where like different families will bring up different kids. But why I talk about these ones, because remember in the early conversations, I spoke about little things I might have went through. But and them parents, I wasn't discussing too much in my thing. So I'm still not going to discuss them too many times. But the ones that the good parenting side I got from them. And this is what I'm going to relate to my time in Stoke Newton. In Stoke Newton, I learned a lot of different things and a bit more structure. Whereas I say it was more of a loving family because they had their own kids and they had grandchildren. But these grandchildren was my age. So I think he's like my foster brothers and foster sisters. I went on holiday with them. Well, to be fair, America, Jamaica, and they kind of give me another little side to life that I didn't. Like I said again, remember, I always respect my mom and my dad. My dad's going to come into these conversations because he's always been about as well. But as I said, in the 80s, it was different because you could go home, children, foster, and then you had a social worker. Depending on how you was. I remember I was very, I wouldn't say a troublesome kid, but I started knowing I could do what I wanted to do. And after a certain time, there was not really going to be a lot stopping me. When I mean stopping, not like I was doing it. I'll just be turning up now. I was accepting children's home. I was expecting new families. I was welcoming. They was welcoming me and I wasn't worried either. So I just learned to just sit down, pack my bags, take yourself to the room, maybe come and meet the family, their family. And then we go from there. But then school uniform, I said I was well groomed. By God's grace, everywhere I was going then, it was getting better and better. So back to Stoke Newton anyway. This is like 89, going on to 90, 90, 91. So remember me and my brother used to go from...

four in the morning. So he's got to get up, he's got to get up to school and then maybe after school I'll go to my mum's. Maybe by 6.30 get picked up back to Stoke Newington. So this is what's becoming. And then in them early years, when I say structure in the streets, me and my brother used to start, we're outside. So after school I said I'll still be playing outside of school. But as for the structure side of things, remember certain times I'm talking, a lot of people say I should slow down, but this is my story. And where I end up in these stories, I'd like you to listen to the kids, even mums and dads, because I'm just going to try and get through mine. And I know this is going to say, people want to say why not stick to, no, I can't stick to the story because right now, this started off as me being in my cell on my last sentence, writing some little short reach, short reach, reflecting on my life. As I said, I've done a blog, so this is for people that might not be listening, they might not want to go back to come forward. So I'm going to have to go back for you. And then it was come out of prison after the last year. I've been out a year in it, but I've done these letters before. And then it was the blog, and then I'm trying to remember, I've got my own kids, and I'm reflecting on life, and I said, right, let me just have a little platform, a little blog where people can come and tell their stories, and kind of teasing that generation. So it was never going to be about me and my story, but however it's turned out, I've had to start putting myself out there. So I'm going to put myself out there, not briefly, I'm going to try and give you as most as I can. As I said, we're going to go on a long time with this, so I'm going to try and get through all them contexts where I can share my life story, and then eventually people are going to come into life. So just sorry for the way I move quick in it, because as I said, this was a part of the plan, but I'm going to try and give it to you lot for you lot to listen, yeah? So sorry for that little briefing, but back to Stoughton Inn anyway. So basically me and my brother used to do is wake up in the morning, and this is for the kids out there, because I don't know what you lot do today to get yourself motivated or understanding what's going on in the streets in it, and through my story, I want to know how we become different in it, and that back to the kids that went to school, but went straight on from school, and then the ones that was playing out of school and coming home later and later and later, and as I relate a lot to the stuff to the children, because we kind of didn't have no time to go in. Anyway, early years, so what were we in? 89, 1990. I used to, from Stoughton Inn, this is where me and my brother used to learn a bit of grafting. When I say grafting, it's just legal work. We used to wash cars, so it's like, wake up with our bucket and sponge. I think them days I was earning a fiver, and me and my brother used to scrub, you know, we used to graft, and this is why I'm just keep relating this, why I talk about the little structure, what I went through, and how it kind of moulded me today, good or bad, and if I can teach the rest, I'm going to teach you, yeah? So remember, just penny, not even penny for the guy don't even come in yet. So we used to wash the cars. Me and my brother used to wash the cars, yeah? And then remember, I've got foster brothers, and they're like Stoughton Inn, Hackney, Waltham Road, so I was there from 89 till 1992, I think. Yeah, 1992. But as I said, you'd always see me in Walthamstow as well, and Chingford on the estate, and respect my stepdad Tony Shelley over Chingford Hall, because me, my brothers, my older brothers and sisters, not too much my older brothers, me and Richard, he looked after us for years, and why I'm on this conversation now, my auntie, the Gomez's, Lorraine and that, because they looked after me in the 80s as well, in Chingford, opposite Heathcote School.

Yeah, as well, so that's why I lock me a lot of them things with guys from the early eighties, all over Chingfloo estate through my stepdad and my brothers and that, so as I said, appreciate all these different influences, mums and dads that brought me up, my cousins, my aunties and all that. Anyway, but I was with Zion, supposed to be with Zion for them three years anyway in Stoke Newham. As I said, you can see I've been all over the little globe, we had them and little things. Anyway, but early years were really hackney where I see certain things. So me and my brother was going to school one day. Remember I said, I think it's about 91 now because we're on a bus. I'm definitely on a free for whatever from Stoke Newham to Seven Sisters, whatever is going to take me down to school, back to Walthamstow. And there's on Stoke Newham Highway, there's a little bookies on the right hand side. Obviously, we used to play out after school. Them days it was 90-90 cola. So if anyone remembers, there used to be a competition where you can just get this little football, Coca-Cola bottle football and do your little football skills and you can kind of get recognised and kind of go that way in football, if you was into football. I was into football as well, but that's not. We can talk about that during the time of sports and all that, because that's in my blog as well, the sports, how they affect us differently. Anyway, me and my brother was on the bus this day, but Stoke Newham High, I was going to school and I was watching them. For some reason, remember, I'm observing because wherever I'm going, I have to be. Well, I don't have to be, but I'm just observing as every kid is. We kind of observe, we see what's going on. So I'm on the bus watching down. So I'm on the bus. So maybe this ain't a school day because remember, I used to get a cab to school, but maybe I've done that. Maybe the cab didn't turn up this day, but me and my brother on the bus, I never get. Could have been a Saturday though, I'm telling the truth. Might have been a Saturday, that's right. Might have just been going up to all Stamford Hill. I'm just watching off the bus and I could see some black guys. Yeah, there were some black guys hanging around near the alleyway. And then I see a woman come in and then the woman went and banged and I just see the man. The man just snatched the thing, but my brother see the same thing I see. So he just snatched this woman's pants or bag, whatever, and he was going straight through. I said, fucking hell. And she was in shock and they was running down. But as I was growing up in Hackney, I started going Chimes, Pegasus, 1991. And remember the first person I was with, they was into the music thing as well. And the girl, my foster sister at them times, ranking as, sorry if I didn't want to really throw your name out there, but come on, it's all love. She's a little rapping as well. And so she was like a DJ in Dougie's, that's it, Dougie's them times, yeah? Chimes, on me and Aces, the guy and I was VIP. Remember the ages I'm in, I'm eight and nine. And then if you know Clapton them times as well, there's an alleyway there. So all them old school Hackney, man, I don't need to just start name dropping. The ones I've grown with, they'll appreciate it, but I'll still have to reach out. And that's the first time I started seeing these little sharp things. People just play with these little sharp things. But these older guys are just hanging around in alleyway next to Dougie's time. And then as I said, the businessman will be coming through from work, hit the alleyway, and he don't really make it through the alleyway because they kind of take his stuff. And this is some real stuff, some real. And what I later know now, this is what we call street robberies or robbing, taking people's stuff. So these are little things I was growing up seeing. And as I said, I don't know, and well, I do know how they might later on influence my little upbringing, coming from where I've come from. Moving forward again, so from the children's home, no, first I guess, we went on holiday. So as I said, there's only so much we can discuss in holiday. The main thing is

Some of us go in these places, yeah, and we kind of, we get treated differently, as I said earlier on in my conversation, where other people have been through. I can't say I've been through certain things. Mine might be emotional, not cuddling, not getting the 100% love that you get from your mum and dad, you know what I'm saying? But I've got 80%. Everywhere I was going, I was getting 80%. So I started being a bat, and as I said again, Forest Road is like a mecca because I've got brought up by a million people once I come into 1990, 1991. And also during these conversations, there's a lot of people that have influenced my life, yeah? Same age, old as, and I haven't really spoke about it, and they have big influence to me, but they also come about when it's 1990, 1991, and it's not about anyone else, it's about me trying to reach out to the generation, just so you don't go through what I went through, because I might come across smooth, smooth, it's work, it's hard, and it's kind of, yeah, and I'll get, yeah, 100% my last little time, I'm getting a bit, you're seeing my emotional side, innit? So I'm just going to try and reach you lot, tell the story, all the mums as well, dads out there, it's not, I'm just trying to tell a story so we kind of do things differently, yeah? But as I said again, I don't know how long I've gone on again, and I'll keep it straight with you lot. I'm in 1990, coming on from next week, and as I said, this, and I have to rectify, thank you for listening, if you've been listening, you might have expected more or less, I don't know what's going on here, as I said, I'm just trying to reach a generation, yeah? And we're going to go again next week, but we're going to try and get through my little scenario, my life story to reach you lot, and then I'm going to go, there's people that I've got to come and share their story with you, yeah? So thank you for listening, yeah? Thank you.